Now that the school has started I will have less time to write in this blog. I hope that is okay with most of you. Between the newsletters, blog, the new school, teaching, writing a newsletter for the school, meeting with staff and students, and eating, sleeping, and spending time with my husband...I literally have no time to update this thing. But I will try my best!
The rains have finally stopped here in Lonavala. I am finally able to hang my freshly washed clothes outside to dry in the sun. It's a great feeling. I wish that I could take down all the walls in my house to just let the insides dry out as well.
I finished my first four days of teaching here and it was fun. I can say that being the first teacher the students see for the nine month course is actually a blessing. It helped me get to know the students quicker than I would have if I sat in the back of the classroom. I am not an incredibly social person and so purposefully approaching people I barely know to have "small talk" is not my cup of tea. However, as a teacher, I need to interact with them; get to know them so that I can teach them better.
My days are busy. I think we can all agree to that.
Dear friend's birthday party!
The work will never stop now that it's started.
The new students, playing a game of sorts.
My two window guardians. They protect me from moths and other large, flying insects that try to get into my house.
This winter is going to be a little sad yet good. I will be flying home at the end of this month and my husband will also be traveling home at the end of next month. This only means one thing: we will spend our first Christmas as a married couple apart. I will be in Minnesota and he will be in Nagaland. It's not ideal, but it has to happen. This will hopefully be a kickstart his visa process during our apartness. Apparently, "apartness" is an actual word because my computer did not correct my spelling.
I just got my plane ticket home yesterday. This brought me to realize something I never was able to admit before; something that has been steadily growing as the years go by; something I wish didn't exist but can't help to be sure it does.
I am afraid of flying.
Perhaps it's not the flying I'm afraid of, but death. I am not sure where this debilitating fear came from, but it's there and it's terrifying. I'm becoming a super-hypocondriac and am very quick to jump to the worst conclusions in most situations. I'm not sure where this started happening and how I've been feeding this fire, but it's been steadily getting worse and worse since I first came to India. I'm not even sure how to begin the healing or restoration process.
Finances are the least of my worried thoughts that clutter my mind. I think maybe this is what I was supposed to discover after hearing that God wants to give me some sort of freedom. I was not sure what I needed freedom from. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to let go of in order to receive this freedom, but now I can be sure that I must let go of my fear of...well, everything. I don't know how to do that though. But, I suppose acknowledging the problem is the first step after all, right?
On that happy little note, I really must say how excited I am to be back in Minnesota. I cannot wait to be there in the cold of November and December. I miss being cold. I've been hot, sweaty, and sticky for so long that I forget what it's like to be cold and dry; to be able to wear sweaters every moment of every day never getting that stickiness on my neck from sweat; to be able to drink chai without getting over-heated; to be able to wear closed-toed shoes again. Yes, I miss the cold. I think that I am not made for heat. I regret ever complaining of it being too hot during Minnesota summers. Now I laugh at my old self who complained of "heat waves" or some nonsense like that.
So, if I can just distract myself by re-reading the first five books of George R.R. Martin's "A Song of Ice and Fire" series (a.k.a. the Game of Thrones books) on the plane. Then, before I know it I'll be home again. In the cold, riding in my Mom's car to the only home that I knew for the first 23 years of my life.
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